Merriam-Webster definition “passage from one state, stage, subject, or place to another: change”
Why do we coach transition (change)? Transition at times is difficult. There are many reasons for it being difficult. Doing new things or creating new things takes lot of mental energy. With transition comes a lot of new things.
- New visions
- New discovery of your purpose
- New mission
- New social interactions
- New habits
- New perceptions
- New skills
It is more than just learning something new, transition is changing who we are being. At times this is simple and other times more difficult. What does it take to go from learning to play a guitar, to a good guitar player then to becoming a Master? What must change? Who do you have to become? Becoming a person who thrives on learning and practicing the instrument. It is a becoming.
Transition many times meets up with resistance. Change means giving up old habits and creating new ones. A big change is our own perception of ourselves. How do we see ourselves? Seeing ourselves beyond the transition period arriving at a new stage or state; who we are being.
Transition brings many strange feelings along with this change. We confuse fear with excitement. Our feelings can lie to us or confuse us. Feeling fearful about starting a new habit or experience may be just a strong sense of excitement we are unfamiliar with. Knowing your purpose clarifies what your feelings are telling you.
No matter what state of being we are at for long time it starts to become comfortable. When we stretch and grow with transition it is mentally like running with a large rubber band around your waist. The resistance gets stronger as we go, so much so we are drawn back to our state of comfort. The person we are now is comfortable coasting on autopilot. Like learning to drive, we must learn many new skills until it becomes second nature. Things we do on auto pilot are done with unconscious thought. A safe comfortable place to reside or run back to. We become comfortably stuck or even uncomfortably stuck. Reminds me of story of guy walking by a home. Home owner is sitting on porch with his coon hound lying next to him. Every few seconds the coon hound lets out a strong bawl. The passerby cannot stand it he has to ask, “Why is your dog howling like that?” The gentleman on porch says, “He is lying on a nail sticking up.” Passerby asks, “Why won’t he move?” The dog owner says, “Oh it hurts him, but not bad enough to do anything about it.” We become uncomfortably stuck. Returning to that state of comfort means staying who we are. Worse yet it means justifying in our own minds why we are giving up on our visions and purpose of who God created us to be.
We want to transition but are drawn to the old way of being. Transition takes time. Changing from a heavy-set person who eats whatever looks good to a person of healthy weight includes changing who we are. We become the person who genuinely likes and picks healthy foods out of our new desires. It takes time, patience is paramount. Over time with transition, we become that healthy weight person, changing our long-term perception of ourselves. Each attempt at changing a habit is like a practicing shooting basket. Keep practicing. If you fail to develop the habit at first keep practicing. Zig Ziglar used to say, “Anything worth doing is worth doing badly long enough until you become good at it” Each attempt is just a practice to get better.
Transitions like becoming a college student, becoming a teacher, becoming a business owner, becoming a husband or wife, becoming a parent, becoming a retiree, becoming a _______ (you fill in blank) are all transitions. You notice I did not say start college, start business or get married. Transition includes changing who we are being.
Life will deal us involuntary transitions. How we handle them and who we become because of them will reveal the depth of our vision and purpose we are living out.
Are you comfortably stuck or worse yet uncomfortably stuck? What purpose did God create you for?